For Anyone Who Has Ever Lost Someone

“My Grandfather texted me the day before he died. . .”

- From the song “His Eyes” by the author of this post Lance Mason

The Viewing

I cried in the middle of a Wal-Mart on a Wednesday afternoon. Just one tear. I’m not sure why. Sadness? Shock? I guess it doesn’t really matter because you wouldn’t believe me if I told you. But I saw a man who looked just like my Grandpa, yesterday. Strolling through Wal-Mart in the paper plates aisle.

I already bought the toothpaste I came for. But I pretended I was still shopping, I was clutching the plastic bag. Act normal.

Do You Recognize Me?

Maybe that’s why he didn’t smile back at me. Something is different about me, I’m more confident then I was last year. More sure of the man that I want to be. Besides, no 24 year old is shopping for paper plates on a Wednesday afternoon. But I had to get closer.

The Summer of Hell: When My Grandpa Passed

Last Summer was one of the toughest summers of my life. The Summer my Grandpa passed away, it hurt like Hell. Whoever said time heals all lied. Because seeing the man in Wal-Mart who resembled my Grandfather hurt just as much as seeing my Grandfather at his viewing on June 21st, 2017.

My phone is messed up. The texts between me and my Grandpa got wiped clean. I guess that’s T-Mobile’s way of telling me to move on. All I have is the last text he sent me.

My Grandpa texted me to confirm the details that my brothers and I could go to the Annual Father’s Day breakfast at his Church. We went every year.

The Summer of Hell: Issues with New York Transportation

“It will be a Summer of Hell for commuters”

- New York Governor Andrew Cuomo on May 23, 2017

The transit issues in New York are no secret to anyone, and the Summer of 2017 was no exception. Construction in Penn Station turned everyone’s schedules on their head and made delays unavoidable for most.

Summer of Hell pretty much captured my entire experience last summer in 2017. It was the combination of two events (my Grandpa passing and the issues in traveling to New York City).

Summer of Hell 2018

June 21, 2018 marks the first day of Summer. A new Summer of Hell. But I hope to change the meaning of it and turn it into something positive. I will be writing and sharing a song for each day over the next year until Summer 2019 in an attempt to break a Guinness world record for “Most consecutive Hip Hop Songs written, recorded, and published”

Why are you publishing music for a year?

I won’t lie the idea kind of came to me from a video from Gary Vaynerchuk and I sat with the idea for a long time. But things kind of all aligned at the right moment for this and it made sense to do it.

My Grandpa was in the Air force. When a veteran passes, during the service they fold an American flag for a member of the family. The flag is folded 12 times. 12 folds, 12 months I will make music and even though I may want to quit after each month I won’t fold.

Significance of the 12 Flags/12 Months

The below information on the significance of the 12 folds were found at the above website.

1. The first fold of our flag is a symbol of life.
2. The second fold is a symbol of our belief in eternal life.
3. The third fold is made in honor and remembrance of the veteran departing our ranks, and who gave a portion of his or her life for the defense of our country to attain peace throughout the world.
4. The fourth fold represents our weaker nature; as American citizens trusting in God, it is to Him we turn in times of peace, as well as in times of war, for His divine guidance.
5. The fifth fold is a tribute to our country, for in the words of Stephen Decatur, “Our country, in dealing with other countries, may she always be right, but it is still our country, right or wrong.”
6. The sixth fold is for where our hearts lie. It is with our heart that we pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
7. The seventh fold is a tribute to our armed forces, for it is through the armed forces that we protect our country and our flag against all enemies, whether they be found within or without the boundaries of our republic.
8. The eighth fold is a tribute to the one who entered into the valley of the shadow of death, that we might see the light of day, and to honor our mother, for whom it flies on Mother’s Day.
9. The ninth fold is a tribute to womanhood, for it has been through their faith, love, loyalty and devotion that the character of the men and women who have made this country great have been molded.
10. The 10th fold is a tribute to father, for he, too, has given his sons and daughters for the defense of our country since he or she was first born.
11. The 11th fold, in the eyes of Hebrew citizens, represents the lower portion of the seal of King David and King Solomon and glorifies, in their eyes, the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.
12. The 12th fold, in the eyes of a Christian citizen, represents an emblem of eternity and glorifies, in their eyes, God the Father, the Son and Holy Ghost.

When the flag is completely folded, the stars are uppermost, reminding us of our national motto, “In God We Trust.”

The idea made more sense because not only was yesterday (June 21st) the anniversary of his funeral service but it was also the first day of the Summer (which coincided with my idea of the Summer of Hell explained above), and starting with the Summer, on a day that has significance to me, on the first day of summer made so much sense.